If You Could Trade Your ET for Any Other Disorder, Would You?

Posted on August 14, 2019

Each semester, the International Essential Tremor Foundation presents four scholarships to students with essential tremor. The scholarships represent hope for the future, and provide support to these students during a pivotal time in their lives. As part of the scholarship application process, each applicant is asked to write an essay that answers the question, “How has essential tremor affected my life?” The following essay is from one of our fall 2019 scholarship recipients.

By Anna Grace Easley
2019 IETF Scholarship Recipient,
Student at William Carey University, Hattiesburg, MS

Anna Easley, 2019 IETF Scholarship Recipient

Like millions of others in the United States, I suffer from essential tremor or ET. At the age of two years old, my mom started to notice my hands shaking when I would go to reach for my toys. I didn’t realize that my hands shook until the age of four years old when I was learning to tie my shoes. From that point on, I knew that simple everyday tasks were slightly more difficult for me than they were for other kids my age. I would struggle to tie my shoes, put my hair in a ponytail, paint my nails or even color a picture. My tremors got worse with age and I began to notice that other people in my family, like my father and grandfather, had the same condition.

By the time I started high school, my ET got to the point where I started to get picked on at school. People at school would call me “shakes” and would laugh every time I would spill a drink or drop something due to my ET. It was at this point when my family and I decided that I should go see a doctor.

At the age of 14, I was diagnosed with essential tremor by Dr. Shankar Shiva Natarajan. He prescribed me medicine to help my ET, but the medicine could only do so much. The thing that I am most passionate about in my life is music and theatre, so when ET started to affect how I play guitar, how I held a microphone or how I was able to perform on a stage, I would get frustrated with myself because there was nothing I could do to control it. I got to the point where I would cry every time I went to the neurologist. Every time, he would tell me, “If you do not let your tremors bother you, they will not bother anyone else.” I took this advice and I would try to not let it affect me, but my tremor continued to affect how I viewed myself. I felt as if I was not fit to be a musician because of my condition, and the thought of that was devastating.

At my next doctor’s visit, Dr. Natarajan told me something that completely changed my perspective. He asked me, “If you could trade your ET for any other disorder, would you?” I began to ponder this question. I would not trade it for blindness, deafness, paralysis, amputation or any other physical disability. It was at this moment that I realized how truly blessed I am.

From that point on, I decided that ET is a part of my life, but it cannot dictate who I am as a person. I have made the choice to pursue music despite any difficulties I may face. Although ET has had a great impact on my life, I will continue to push through and face every challenge with a positive attitude.

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Do you want to help support students with ET during their educational journey? Make a donation to the IETF scholarship fund online.