How Has Having Essential Tremor Affected My Life? (Scholarship Essay)

I will never forget the first time I noticed my symptoms of essential tremor (ET). My mom asked me to put her necklace on for her. As I positioned the gold chained necklace together, I found my hands taken over by uncontrollable shaking. What was first a confusing occurrence that I thought would be over, turned into a repeating problem that consumed most of my life. Confusion turned to fear as my parents took me to see a neurologist. It was at my first appointment when I was officially diagnosed with ET.

At 16 years old, I was in the beginning of the notoriously intense junior year of high school. For myself, this meant multiple writing and lab-intensive Advanced Placement (AP) classes. I found myself with an overwhelming feeling of dread. How could I possibly work at the same level, write at the same speed, or perform tasks with the same efficiency as I had previously?

I soon found a quote that helped put my situation into perspective. “If you assume that there is no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope.” Spoken by Noam Chomsky, these words reminded me that I had two options: Let my tremors win and guarantee my falling behind, or work as hard as I could to adapt to my new normal, leaving my academic future with hope.

With the continual support of my parents, I discussed what I was going through with my teachers, and explained that while we were working to gain accommodations through the school, this was my new reality. Though difficult, the drive to not let my academics crumble in hopes of attending one of my first choice colleges, powered me through the year. By the end of my junior year, we had successfully created a 504 plan for my senior year, so I would always have the appropriate accommodations in class.

The unfortunate reality is that the challenges presented by my tremors stretched beyond the classroom. From spilling drinks at my previous place of work, to playing cards with my grandma, I am always reminded of my ET diagnosis. Despite this, I am thankful to be seen by an incredible neurologist who has started me on medication to ease my shaking.

As my parents always remind me, I have had the largest of aspirations throughout my life. I look at challenges as roadblocks that pave new routes to where I am meant to be. Nothing could have prepared me for my ET diagnosis.

As I continue my academic career at Cornell University majoring in nutritional sciences on a pre-medicine track, my goal is to further educate others about ET and help those affected everyday like myself. As I look ahead to the future, I see that the resilience, determination and belief in myself gained from ET has made me who I am today.

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If you want to be involved in supporting students with essential tremor as they work toward their higher education goals, consider making a donation to the Catherine Rice Scholarship Fund. The IETF awards up to 10 college scholarships each year to students with essential tremor.